I realize that I still am in the learning stage of what really happens when a man loves a woman. To be honest, I think a percentage of married people never even really experience that. Of course, they probably think they do. But they marry for other reasons, and they expect that the other will keep the promises they made on their wedding day. But people change. We carry the burden of turning out like our parents sometimes, despite our determination that we will be different. People often marry too young, thinking they have grown up, but they haven't. And when they finally discover what maturity and responsibility is all about, they discover that their significant other has not reached that point, and probably never will. That burning, strong feeling of commitment to the other seems to burn out after a few years. And it turns into resentment for a connection that maybe should never have been made.
Sometimes, people give up the love of their life because of mistakes that have been committed, and they don't have sense to try and fix them. They will never be happy, and their loved one will never find true happiness either.
Marilyn and I meet often over tea-iced tea for me, since I don't prefer the real kind. We discuss love as if it were an abstract form of art, never to be totally understood. The same goes with men.
I wasn't too surprised when Marilyn announced her engagement. I was excited for the couple, who had been separated for so long. Their love was something I had often dreamed of-long-lasting and never changing.
They would deal with some of the same problems other couples have, but with a maturity that we all wished for.
I was surprised to hear that Marilyn was not going to keep the antique engagement ring we had sent her.
She showed me a sparkly 1-carat diamond rock, which was as bright as her smile. What was going to happen to that old ring, I wondered?
As if she knew what I was thinking, she said, "It went back and forth between everyone. Bob did not want me to keep something tied down with so much bitterness. And Jack didn't want it back. But it seems to me that you paid for it, so ..."
"Well, I guess I did, sort of," I said, filling the silence and remembering my search around town looking for the ring.
"But you did actually buy it, didn't you?"
"I guess so."
She pulled the black case out of her pocket and together we inspected the ring. I then tried slipping it on my finger, but I did not have the slim fingers that she had. Mine were stubby and crooked. Nothing special.
And a ring would only make their ugliness stand out.
